So in my quest to live to the fullest and experience joy on daily basis last week I signed up for a dance class and committed myself to going once a week at lunch time. Today I went to my first full hour dance class in 15 years. I haven't moved in some of those ways in years! So now my hips are sore and my butt cheaks hurt, but it was worth it for all the fun I had. I love to dance, so much so that some people have said "I'm a dancin' fooooool" [to quote Zappa].

I enjoyed it so much I can't wait to go back next week. I'm counting the days, the hours and the minutes. Hmmmm, could this be love? Sigh, it certainly feels like it. So what prompted me taking this dance class? What was my inspiration? One of the women who works on my floor is a competitive ballroom dancer! She has the body of a goddess and glides as she walks! I want her body!

Nooooo, not in THAT way you pervs! But in me working on myself in this fun wonderful way to slowly get there. A Cyd Cherisse or Ginger Rodgers I'll never be, but in the right masterful hands, like those of my award winning dance instructor, I can at least reach a higher plane than where I am. Sigh!

Posted by: Michele at 01:41 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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Gosh, I'm very touched by your emails of concern and support. There's so much I want to say to you all or to blog but I have very little time today, so here goes some drive by blogging from my treo as I go back to work from a downtown meeting using the subway. Yep, I'm riding the subways just like the 4.5 million of my fearless compatriots who travel with me daily, displaying the same non-chalant attitude my brothers and sisters stationed on the front lines display every day. Just like my fellow warriors, I AM NOT AFRAID!

So as my train travels underneath the UN, the Queensbourgh Bridge, and the 2 biggest Synagogues in NYC today I send a message to the idiots who are trying to destroy our way of life... you can bomb us if you want, you can try to establish your kingdom from Salamanca to California and on to Indonesia, and in that process we may bleed and we may even cry, but never, ever confuse our tears with a sign of weakness or fear.

You may frighten some men, women and children, but you will never, ever frighten the majority of Americans, and you will definitely never intimidate our southern men! If anything you'll piss them off all the more. They have a long-standing history of defending their life, liberty and property. Don't believe me? Just go ahead and try and you'll see what we're all really made of!

Posted by: Michele at 01:37 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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- Well, the magical magnetic orb finally exited swiftly this morning without limited fanfare and to the relief of all (Dr., son & me).

- I am still without a gag reflex as I was tested once again. This time I was tested for legitimate reasons, to make sure that my mild case of strep was gone. When my Doctor called the NYU hospital lab they apparently could not find the results for the tests the Residents did on Sunday. Yep, there was no record of my throat being swabbed.

- On the upside, the results of my physical have revealed that IÂ’m healthy and well. According to my Dr, I have the insides of a 25 year old. Now all I have to do is work on getting my outsides to match my insidesÂ…. but wait, isnÂ’t beauty skin deep anyway? Hey baby [purposeful winking ensues], wanna see my liver? Heh, heh, heh!

Finally, due to the ER visit this weekend I missed my most favorite event of the year - the Medieval Festival! For 2 years IÂ’ve vied against many other women, some incredibly beautiful ladies, for the coveted role of Lady Isabella who presides over the Sunday afternoon jousts and Gala dinner. I dress in a black version of the little number you see below, with a matching headpiece that makes me stand out even amongst the tallest person in the room. At both events I get to sit near the King and Queen as I watch the jousters vie for my honor and my handkerchief. Yes, Contagion is not the only one in the Bad Example Family who is a re-enactor. And I'm no mere Mortar Maiden, nope, I'm a Lady!

So how did I win this coveted role? I was the person who spoke the longest, enunciated the clearest in an Olde Middle English accent. I also didnÂ’t have the shrill little girl voice women are prone to have these days, like my competitor. Well, it was all for naught! She got to go (instead of me) and dined with Kings, Princes, Knights of the Round Table, some who were also dragon slayers.

Big sigh! IÂ’ll have to wait till next year and see if I can be a Lady once again.

Posted by: Michele at 12:09 AM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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1 I'm thinking that those evil docs just wanted to do another gagless throat swab. It is, after all, a thing of beauty. ;-)

Posted by: Jim - PRS at October 06, 2005 03:54 AM (BjDAE)

2 Wait a sec...no gag reflex and you're only a Lady once a year? Uhhhh... IN all seriousness, congrats on your demagnetized son!

Posted by: zonker at October 06, 2005 08:16 AM (/y7q3)

3 I would never have guessed you where a re-enactor. I used to do the medieval period years ago, I still have my Scottish Lords costume and my wife has a lovely Ladies gown. We moved to the FnI period years ago, we had more fun and since we did it for the history, the fantasy folk really started to bother us. But now that I know this, I really need to get you to pose with the Howling Jezebel.

Posted by: Contagion at October 06, 2005 01:16 PM (Q5WxB)

4 Michele, ya look a little pale in that pic. Try to get some sun, ok? :-)

Posted by: Harvey at October 06, 2005 06:08 PM (ubhj8)

5 LOL! Glad this too has passed (hmmmm, should you tell him the monkey/fit check joke?), and sorry you missed out this year. Harvey is right, though, you do look a little pale...

Posted by: Laughing Wolf at October 07, 2005 08:14 AM (zI0Ey)

6 Hi! Great site ... I love it. I spotted a picture, dated October 9, 2004 of an asian girl ... can you forward to me a higher resolution copy of this image if you have one, or direct me to where to find it? Thanks!

Posted by: AlexanderRex at October 07, 2005 10:12 AM (UQhp6)

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You're Bettie Page! What Classic Pin-Up Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Thanks to Oddybobo for the link that reveals my true inner beach bunny/dominatrix side! Wow, she even looks a little like me too in this picture!

Posted by: Michele at 12:02 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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1 Wow Bettie Page, now there is something to be very proud of she kicks ass Next question you should be asking yourself do I own enough riding crops lol Regards, GBfan

Posted by: gbfan001 at October 07, 2005 06:57 PM (TQzKH)

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There have been a few times when IÂ’ve been so sleep deprived that invariably the level of sleep deprivation causes a density in my brain which renders me unable to think properly, thereby creating really bad or sticky situations.

Well, there I was in the ER with my son as they were checking him out when they noticed that his throat was a bit red and inflamed. So they decided to do a throat culture.
Normally, when we go to my sonÂ’s pediatrician, his doctor demonstrates what it entails by swabbing my throat first. When my son sees that IÂ’m okay, he submits to the procedure without a problem. So my son negotiates with the Resident sent in to do the culture to swab me first. Once he agrees he approaches me with the swab.

Being a very compliant patient I open my mouth wide and wait for him to swipe it against my throat. After he’s done he says (mostly to himself), “Wow, that’s amazing.” My son, thinking something’s wrong, quickly asks “What’s amazing?”

Struggling to find words he stammers, “Oh… uh… eh… your mom… [he then smiles] she’s a great patient. Now open wide just like mommy.”

He leaves us and we go back to coloring in the coloring book. From where I sat I could see him consulting with some of his colleagues and pointing in our direction. IÂ’m not overly concerned as weÂ’re both finally in good health, except for the metal ball temporarily lodged in my sonÂ’s stomach.

The Resident returns 5 minutes later with 2 of his colleagues and explains that given what had gone on at my office (an outbreak of Infectious Mono between the legal interns and analysts) they decided to test me as well just to be on the safe side.

As the Resident raised his hand to my mouth I asked why 2 swabs. He explained they needed to do 2 separate tests, one on each tonsil. So I opened my mouth wide to let him swab away. The 2 guys behind him bent down to look over each of his shoulders. One was making himself useful by holding the penlight to illuminate my throat.

After swabbing both tonsils, the guy without the flashlight, says out loud, “We should also swab the back of her throat…” They all looked at each other silently for a couple of seconds, I guess to think over this proposal. The lead Resident then asks, “Is that okay?”

I nodded yes, and opened my mouth once again. They swabbed the back of my throat a few extra times and then collected all the covered specimens and left without saying a word. Once outside the room I overheard one say “Wow, that’s amazing, I’ve never seen that, she had no gag reflex!”

When Colin (my co-blogger) called today to check up on me and my son I was truly touched. He asked for details of how things had gone. Having a boatload of doctors in his family, meant that he had some idea if anything else needed to be done. He listened carefully and only interrupted to ask questions when clarification was needed. That was until I got to the ResidentÂ’s comment. At that moment he busted out laughing with such a hearty laughter that I was left confused as to what was so funny. He must have laughed for a good five minutes before he was able to calm himself down and I could ask him what had been so funny.

He paused briefly to consider my question before asking, “Michele…. you really don’t know what’s so funny?

I hesitated in answering because I was just too tired to think clearly. I hate it when I’m the last person to get a joke, and today, my grey matter was total concrete. So I tried to think hard what about “gag reflex” could possibly make Colin laugh so hard, especially knowing his proclivity for sexual humor… and suddenly it hit me like a ton of bricks.

Hearing my long loud gasp he begins to laugh once again, and stops just long enough to say “that’s priceless” and for me to say an indignant “Later” and hang up. I was so embarrassed I wanted the earth to swallow me whole. Now that a few hours have passed I do see the humor in it.

Now itÂ’s off to bed with me to ensure I get enough sleep so my non-gag reflexes donÂ’t cause me any more embarrassing moments.

Posted by: Michele at 12:01 AM | Comments (15) | Add Comment
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In the Emergency Room w/ my son, Misha. We've been here since 8:30am. He swallowed a piece from an erector set - a smooth round magnetic metal ball 3/4 of an inch in diameter - and We, the dr's & I, are now waiting for him to pass it through his body w/out complications. He's been having stomach cramps so we know where the thing is.

oh the joys of motherhood & single parenting.

Update 10/3/05:
Since there was no movement they released him/us from the hospital and gave us some dietary suggestions to help move things along. Sigh! While we were at NYU's ER - the head of pediatrics decided to use my son as a teaching case for all his residents - 30 in all. Yes, we were there that long! Although they tried to look serious and clinical, their grins, as the case was recounted, said it all. My son? He just loved the attention. Something tells me I should go through all his toys and throw out everything that he can possibly fit into his mouth. But I think I'll wait 24 hrs on that, lest I overact and throw everything out.

As for me... I'll rest easy when that ball exits. Where is it now? In the middle of the large intestine. Where am I? Finally resting at home, laying down, watching videos with my son and waiting for this blessed exit to occur!

Posted by: Michele at 01:36 PM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
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1 You've got him sitting on a steel gurney right? Sorry. Hope there are no complications and you're both home soon. P,

Posted by: Light & Dark at October 02, 2005 07:32 PM (+Ds2b)

2 LOL! That's really funny. Paul, thanks for the laugh I needed it.... wait a minute... on the other hand you might have a way to make the darn thing move faster through his body!

Posted by: michele at October 03, 2005 12:16 AM (ht2RK)

3 Hope everything worked out okay!

Posted by: Laughing Wolf at October 03, 2005 08:07 AM (5cMH5)

4 you can thank your lucky stars he swallowed something that will pass on its own...unlike my brother who, at that age, had the inclination that shoving things up his nose was a smart thing to do. we were ALWAYS having to take him to the emergency room to have something removed from way up in the nasal passage where it had gotten stuck... hope everything...er...came out alright...

Posted by: mr. helpful at October 03, 2005 08:32 AM (U28kD)

5 ... ouch... here's to hoping the movement goes off without a hitch... poor little guy...

Posted by: Eric at October 03, 2005 11:02 AM (uHA2j)

6 Hope everything is alright. There's so many jokes that come to mind... Kids are tough. They have to be because of the silly things they do.

Posted by: Ted at October 03, 2005 11:57 AM (blNMI)

7 I hope he's okay. A small round metal ball shouldn't be too hazardous on the digestive tract.

Posted by: Contagion at October 03, 2005 12:47 PM (Q5WxB)

8 As they say, "This too 'shall pass'," and it will become a story that you can tell to his girlfriends some day. Revenge is sweet.

Posted by: Jim - PRS at October 03, 2005 09:43 PM (BjDAE)

9 Wow. I remember my mom having a fit when I swallowed a jingle bell (round ones) on Christmas eve. It passed. Hope the little guy is alright. And you too.

Posted by: vw bug at October 05, 2005 11:15 AM (mD8Rg)

10 I am currently going through the same waiting game. It's been five days since my son swallowed about the same size metal, magnetic ball. I took him today for a follow up xray, still showing the ball to be in his stomach. He has been going to the bathroom quite regularly. I'm getting more and more nervous as the days pass, wondering if this ball is going to come out on its own. How has your situation turned out? Would really appreciate hearing the outcome.

Posted by: Fbeard at October 14, 2005 01:12 PM (/xeZ9)

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