In a recent post DC asked how our tributes are going. IÂ’ve been sorta working on mine for a week now. Rick, Nancy, Mike and the others will be covered by other bloggers. I've written about them before in the past so I was glad to see they are being memorialized by others. IÂ’ve corresponded with 2 of these bloggers to offer them personal intimate anecdotes of my beloved friends that would help give them a different perspective than the brief profile done by the New York Times.

Through the 2996 project I asked to be given 2 people to post tributes for, because so far they only have 63% of people covered. My first assignment, Allison Horstmann Jones, was a random assignment by the program developed for this project. Her tribute was easy to do, then again, I really donÂ’t know her and all I had to do is research her info and pick the items I thought were important to share with everyone. IÂ’ve already completed the first draft of my tribute and just need to do clean it up before posting hers.

The second tribute is for someone I asked DC if he would assign to me. Its for one of my dearest and closest friends, Larry. Ironically, when I checked the list he hadnÂ’t been assigned to anyone. IÂ’ve written about all the others at various times but never about Larry. DonÂ’t know what the mental or spiritual block is but IÂ’ve just never been able to. Just even writing this has made me break down in tears. At his funeral service I turned down his girlfriendÂ’s request to go up and eulogize him. How do you encampsulate over 15years of friendship in just a few minutes. My excuse back then was that by the time his service came around I had already participated in 4 others services and I just couldnÂ’t do another. But somehow I knew there was more to it because I barely made it to the church in time for the service.

That morning I laid in bed unable to move. My spirit and body remained frozen in the same position for hours even after my PDA reminder kept going off. Eventually, Larry’s famous catch phrase and the last words he said to me after I pleaded with him not to go up the tower immediately came back to me: “I’ve got to go, duty calls.” and with that example and reminder in my head I rolled out of bed and onto the floor on all 4 limbs. I kept talking to myself to get up off the floor, much like he did when I had fallen at the hospital during my endless Rehab sessions as he pushed my brain to send messages to my leg muscles to begin to move again.

That day would be filled with memories of him and how he touched my life through the years in a thousand different ways. It has been no different than the 1799 days that have followed. Once again thereÂ’s a thousand small reminders of you dear friend. As I made dinner for my son and house guests last night I recalled how many times you must have stopped by after your shift just to see what I had cooked and whether or not it merited you sitting down with me for dinner or whether it merely would be a quick snack for your drive home. At one point last night I could have sworn I caught a glimpse of you over my eyeglasses, plate in hand, mouth full and chewing while making loud sounds meant to indicate how good it tasted. When I refocused my vision through my eyeglasses I saw it was my brother in law who just wanted to let me know he loved what he was eating so much he wanted to check and see if there were leftovers.

Larry, this morning you may see tears on my face but they are not just tears of sadness and of lossÂ… they are also tears of gratitude and thankfulness that you were there for me every time I fell or faltered and helped nudge me, move me, even push me along my path. And yes, I finally do agreeÂ… failure (even in this) is not an option!

Thanks for being part of my heart in tears and joy!

Posted by: Michele at 11:41 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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